Thursday, March 3, 2011

Thinking back....

A few years ago when I was going through my divorce and separation from V people who knew what was going on in my life would comment on how strong I was or they'd state that they didn't know how I could do it. Now yes, those are kind words possibly meant for encouragement but they eventually started to annoy me. I was only doing what I felt any loving mother should do...keep going.

At that time I was in my early 20s, a mother, a fulltime student, and was employed fulltime. I was mother and father to my daughter. I was a single mom.

Did I have a choice? Yes. I could have stayed in my miserable marriage and let my daughter grow up in a hostile environment. I wouldn't have been a single mother then. I could have stayed but I didn't. I chose a different path. The path of single motherhood.

It was a very scary prospect and I think that's what kept me in my marriage for so long but one day something turned on inside and I made the choice to leave. I left everything behind and started over.

I was 23 and the mother of a 2 year old. I was starting over..with nothing.

I mourned the loss of my marriage but eventually I got over it. Life continued for me and my daughter. I stayed in school, I continued to work, I continued to be mommy.

Was I strong? Maybe. But for me it was something I had to do. I wasn't a superwoman or a wonderwoman. I wasn't the only woman experiencing this and I wouldn't be the last. I was just a single mother that had to get by for her sake and her daughter's sake.

Many of us don't expect to be thrust in the single mother role but it happens and what do you do about it if it happens to you? Exactly what I did. Pick up the pieces and keep going.
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